About three months ago, my husband began to experience restless sleep. I can tell that he’s having a bad dream because he’ll start moving about in bed and whimpering. Then he starts to talk like he’s talking to another person. He often says the same sort of thing, such as, Stop! You’re hurting him! or Please stop, you’re hurting him! When I wake him up from these dreams, he seems totally out of it and can’t remember what he was dreaming about. He falls immediately back to sleep while I lie there wondering what he is going through. This has happened some seven or eight times now, and I am getting really curious about what is going on. Your thoughts?
Susan
Susyn:
Your husband could be having these dreams for a number of reasons. The first question I would ask is if he is under a lot of stress at the moment. Are there work, family or financial matters that are weighing heavily on him? Dreams often address areas of our lives that are out of balance so they can help us process our fears and worries.
Given what he is saying, it appears that he is trying to protect someone in these dreams. Though he can’t recall these dreams in order to help you determine what they’re about, it is clear that he is feeling powerless to prevent someone from being harmed. Many experts on dream interpretation believe that all the characters in our dreams are reflections of ourselves, so it could be that the person being hurt is some aspect of himself. If this is the case, it may be that he feels powerless over some situation or aspect of his life that is causing him pain.
If you think back over the last few weeks and review what has been going on in his life, you may be able to discover the source of these dreams. If he could remember them, it would give you more clues. In the meantime, see if you can find a correlation between what is going on in his everyday life that could correlate with these episodes.
Because it seems he has been having the same dream for the last three months, there is a good chance that these dreams will continue until he can resolve whatever issues he is processing. Once the stress in his life has subsided or he resolves the fear or problem at hand, these dreams should cease.
If these nightmares continue, you might consider placing a piece of turquoise or malachite under his pillow. These stones are known for their protective qualities. In fact, turquoise is often used specifically to alleviate nightmares. Salt is also known for its ability to ground random thoughts and concerns. You can create a protective shield around him by filling a small bowl or plate with table salt. For the best results, place a quartz crystal upright in the middle of the plate and put it on his bedside table.
I don’t feel that these dreams are caused by an evil spirit or anything outside of your husband. If they were, he would wake himself up and have very vivid memories of the dreams. He would also feel that something was trying to harm him instead of expressing concern about someone else being hurt.
Whether he ever becomes conscious of their meaning or not, I am sure that once the stress he is under is resolved, these dreams will cease.
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Oceania:
As restful sleep is important to our overall well-being and our ability to function, I recommend you gently encourage your husband to talk about whatever is troubling him or seek help from a professional. If he’s unwilling to do that and these events truly disturb you, the two of you may have to sleep separately for a while.
When people experience trauma, they sometimes develop symptoms of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). When the mind can’t adequately process an experience, symptoms of PTSD may develop, including repeated recollections of the event, distress when exposed to a reminder of the event, upsetting dreams, and flashbacks that make it feel like the trauma is happening in the present.
People suffering from PTSD may avoid situations that trigger memories of the event and may not be able to remember the event during normal waking consciousness. They may feel estranged from others and suffer from physical symptoms like disrupted sleep, irritability, difficulty concentrating, and being overly watchful and jumpy.
Your husband may have witnessed something traumatic three months ago that involved a male being hurt, or he may have experienced something traumatic as a child. (In this case, the him
he mentions would be himself.) It may also be that something happened three months ago that triggered some painful memories.
When he’s awake, gently share your observations of his behavior during the night to see if he is receptive to discussing what is troubling him. When he’s ready to face his trauma, he will; pushing him to do so prematurely could disrupt his healing process. You might view this as an opportunity to grow closer. Share the fact that your sleep is being disrupted and ask for his opinion on how to best handle the situation.
A more mundane explanation for your husband’s behavior is that he is speaking to YOU in an indirect manner. Explore whether you might be hurting him in some way that he’s unable to articulate. From an atmosphere of safety and with a lack of defensiveness, kindly ask him if you are hurting him in some way, and express your desire to remedy the situation if that is the case.
If he’s talking to you in his sleep, he may fear conflict or your anger, especially if you tend to have a temper. If this is the case, he may be unwilling to share why he’s hurt, so you’ll have to use your best detective skills to identify the problem and correct it in order to improve your relationship and enjoy restful sleep again.
Astrea:
Many times in life we hear, “You will always have what you NEED, but not necessarily what you WANT.” Your spirit must have needed to experience the feeling of leaving your human body, and the suggestion in the next chapter of Sylvia Brown’s book was all it took to get you there.
Even though you hadn’t read it yet, your SOUL recognized the title of that chapter as something it had been seeking, and your soul, knowing that you had that reference to read after your experience, got with it and out you went!
While I don’t usually recommend her books, Sylvia Brown has a wide reaching and powerful effect on lots of people. A Gemini like you would be able to relate easily to her writing and put it to good use. Synchronicity – you gotta love it!
I like your description of “getting caught.” That’s exactly what it feels like, isn’t it? One minute you’re free and hovering above the room, and the next minute, ZAP! back down into your corporeal form you go!
As a little kid, I loved that “feeling of return.” With practice, most of the time we can control that event, but sometimes, when our physical ears hear a distracting noise or something else occurs to knock us back into reality, back we go. With practice you will be able to control your return better.
I find it interesting that you were visiting your mother-in-law and not someone in your own genetic family. Evidently, you and your husband got married for reasons that are even deeper than love. His family’s interest in “psychic stuff” will nurture your children in such matters and help them to grow into their own abilities.
You’ll never have to be concerned that when your daughter visits them, she’ll be discouraged from exploring her own psychic life and power. My parents encouraged me to develop my psychic senses in a time when it wasn’t nice to even discuss such things in public. Heck, it’s STILL not considered a great topic at the dinner table in some families!
Your kids will get to talk about it ALL and ask questions and read and study. This is going to give them such an edge in life! Talk with your husband about how you want to present this to your kiddos, so that you are united in your approach and ready to tell them their experiences are all natural and okay.
A word or two of warning: Geminis often have difficulty staying grounded in REAL LIFE. Don’t get so strung out on your ASTRAL life that you neglect what you’re doing here on Earth.
You are at the beginning of a long journey to learn where your power really lies. Try to be patient with this process and take your time.